Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Stuck in My Creative Life
Why do I have such a hard time writing? Why? Why? Why? When I go to write I'm suddenly too tired to take on such a task and yet I crave it deeply. All day I have thoughts that cross through my narrow-stream of a mind and before I can catch them, the current sweeps them away. You see..I was a writer once and someone told me I'd always be one whether I liked it or not. It left though, and now I'm stuck (stuck being the very best word in my vocabulary to use) with the desire but not power to move. Even writing this is so hard for me that I get up often to look out the window to check my phone or pop chicken in the oven. What happened? I wish there was some clear explanation - a literary trauma that has created a deep mire for my creativity but as I search my mind I can't find it. One day the words just stopped and the words I had produced I hated with a passion so deep that I burned them in my father's wood stove. I want to be unstuck. The more I try though it seems the more stuck I become.